‘Am I normal?’ Craig Revel Horwood admits feeling ‘relief’ upon father’s death

Craig Revel Horwood opens up about his relief after father’s death

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Loose Women welcomed Strictly Come Dancing judge Craig Revel Horwood and James Jordan on Friday afternoon alongside Coleen Nolan and Denise Welch for a Loose Women and Men special. The panellists were speaking about whether men process guilt differently and the concept of “masculine grief”, when Craig opened up about his father’s death and not feeling guilt over his relief. 

After Jordan had spoken about the death of his dad this year, Colleen said to Craig: “Men grieve differently, don’t they.”

Reflecting on his own experience, Craig explained: “My father died about five years ago now, and I’m quite the opposite. I felt relief, not because of his death, but I think because of the relationship that I had with him was finally put to bed. 

“It was an abusive relationship, and he was an alcoholic, and he died from alcohol poisoning drinking too much on that one night.

“[And] For me, it was a great relief actually to see the coffin going into the ground, and I thought this is abnormal, am I not normal or abnormal.”

Colleen interjected and asked: “Did you feel a bit guilty because you felt like that,” with Craig immediately replying, “No, I didn’t.”

Trying to make him feel better, Colleen added: “Well, that’s good, though!”

“I thought this is how I feel, and I said to my family, I said this is how I feel, I feel the weight is not only off my shoulders but his as well,” he explained. 

Jordan added: “Some people do feel guilt that they haven’t been around their parents enough and things like that.”

Craig continued: “My sister Melanie, my younger sister was grief-stricken,” where Denise interjected, “But she had a completely different relationship with your dad.”

Agreeing with Denise, Craig added: “Completely, and the thing I always say that it’s based on the relationship you have with that person.”

“I don’t feel guilty about my dad because he had his life, he’d done all of that, and he was very specific about the funeral, and it was very I am me, and for me to see that go to bed was closure.”

Jordan added to Craig’s comments: “It makes me sad for you because you didn’t have the same relationship with your father that I did with mine.”

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“I would have loved that,” Craig exclaimed, “But I have that relationship with my mother, and I think I would be just devastated if anything was to happen to my mum. 

“Especially that she’s in Australia and can’t get to this country and we can’t go there, and it would be just horrendous to be 10,000 miles away if anything was to happen,” he explained. 

Craig has previously spoken about his abusive relationship with his father and his childhood in his book “In Strictest Confidence”. 

Speaking about his dad, Craig shared: “He drank all day, every day. He’d get drunk and go to be in the afternoon, and then get up and start again, so I never got to spend quality time with him, ever.” 


He added: “My parents split up in 1989 after my father went on a drunken rampage with two loaded shotguns in the street in Australia where I was brought up.

“The neighbours and my family had to hide under beds waiting for police to come, and my dad fired five shots and nearly killed my brother-in-law, David.”

Craig admitted that his relationship gradually got worse with his father as he got older, which is when he moved to the UK and started his career in television. 

Craig’s father passed away in 2015, and he said: “No matter what dad was, and what he was like, good or bad, he was still my dad.”

Loose Women airs weekdays at 12:30pm on ITV. 
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